Questostimony: How do you do Valentine’s Day with boys?

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day! If you haven’t thought of how to celebrate this love holiday with your boys, no worries! We asked moms of boys to chime in on how they celebrate Valentine’s Day with their sons. Which mom do you relate to?

•Kristen J. Mom of 3 boys:

We do a fun family breakfast, heart shaped pancakes.
Love notes on bedroom doors from Feb 1-14.
I also get them a little something!

•Robyn F. Mom of 4 boys, 1 girl:

Valentines Day is my FAVORITE day!!!! Heart decorations everywhere in a house of boys, I don’t care! I remind them about the sacrificial love of Christ. I just love this day!

•Faith F. Mom of 6 boys:

We don’t really celebrate this holiday. I only get stuff for the boys for their class if they ask. But I’m much happier if they don’t lol! I’m not too fond of Valentines Day … I know I’m weird! Heart you ladies who do though 😘😘

•Kristy H. Mom of two boys:

I hope what I’m going to say doesn’t sound braggy or snobby because there are many areas where I fall short! But making sure my boys know that I love them is definitely not one of them I tell them many times every day with deep meaning how much I love them. Whenever I’m thinking about it I tell them how much I like the person that they have grown to be, how important they are to me, what a good job I thought they did or how impressed I am with them, and we spend time praying together each night. I’ve always made a point of telling my boys I love them in many different ways and I always make sure to add that the reason I can love them so much is because God has loved me so much. I buy them small little gifts every now and then, I like to cook their favorite meals for them I like to do special things with them and spend time one-on-one with each of them often as well. So when Valentine’s Day rolls around I feel no pressure to do anything. Sometimes I do things for them if it’s convenient and I have time but most times we do nothing ! And I do not feel bad about it at all 😊

•Julie R. Mom of 4 boys:

My oldest son loves those candy hearts so I got a little box for each boy. I plan to do the “why you’re loved” notes too, I like the idea of a daily note on their door/bed. Like, “you are kind” etc.
I think I’ve given cards & candy in past years. We don’t do much.

Love note to oldest brother. One from mom, the other from little bro. “Payton I am lucky to have you” ❤

 
•Cheri L. Mom of 3 boys:

One son is really into paper airplanes right now. I’m making him make one for each kid in his class for V day. (Luckily there’s only ten lol, small school!). Some years, I put out a fancy table setting with the good dishes. They love it and enjoy it boy style. So funny 😂. My sister watched our boys this weekend and brought Valentine craft stuff for them. (She is used to watching our nieces). Anyway, they were not into it… but after she left, my oldest went all out using the stuff she left behind. He made both my husband and me beautiful cards. The dollar section at the store has cute Valentine things for our table setting. My husband made heart pancakes.  At my request. That was awesome.

There is no perfect standard for showing love to our boys. We all know that. But, there is One who loves us perfectly. Jesus.

This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. 1John 4:10

Happy Valentine’s Day! We hope that as you show love to your boys, your own heart is filled with joy!

Valentine’s Day: Surprised by Love

It’s coming up. This Sunday. The biggest day of failed expectations and disappointments.

I know I’m not the only one, but I’m still embarrassed to admit that I’ve thrown more than a few pity parties because this love day didn’t turn out how I wanted.

I’m just hoping I won’t ruin a perfectly normal day for my family because of my own sad let-down. Which usually just happens all in my head. I actually have a very loving family.

It’s crazy up in there. In my head. There is a stirring of fantasies and desires to receive grande expressions of love. Love that will make me melt with happiness and make life worth all the living.

Usually the dream includes flowers, poems,  awesome get-aways. Of course, I have a new cute outfit, husband smells amazing, and the kids’ faces are clean. If the fateful morning even begins off-kilter from my expectations,  I start to inwardly pout.

A thought will overtake my mind: “Valentine’s Day won’t happen for me if I don’t make it happen”. Love is up to me. I’ve got to give love to get love.

Oh, I’m a smart one. My kids can’t be “expected” to give love. They need to be “taught” how to give love. I will teach them. Kids, let’s make these awesome Valentines! Kids, I will make you heart-shaped pancakes!! Kids, listen to the many reasons why I love you!!! Let’s all group-hug!

I’m a genius wife too. My husband can’t be “expected” to give love. Love must be given to him. I will call him and sing “I just called to say I love you”!!! 🎶 I will text him a sweet love note. I will cook up a favorite meal!!!!

But at the end of the day, I will be sad. I will be resentful. I will act out in frustration and anger that nobody loves me on this special day of love! Boo! Hoo! on me. In all the loving I have done, I was expecting something in return.

I didn’t give beautiful selfless love that my family deserves. Love that gives life. I was giving to receive. And when my unspoken expectations failed, I moaned “yeah, who am I to think that I would receive good love anyway…”

This year is a new year. And God is in the business of making all things new. Even me. The way He is making me new?

He is surprising me with Love.

A new song came out by Chris Tomlin a few months back. A song that is changing my life. Because I am daring to believe the lyrics.

Take a listen: A Good Good Father

The guy starts out singing about his personal experience with God:

I’ve heard the tender whisper of love in the dead of night
And You tell me that you’re pleased
And that I’m never alone

How I enjoy whispers of love. God’s love is eternal, supreme, and available to me anytime I want it. ❤️. Even in my darkest moments.

Somewhere in the middle the song sings words straight out of the bible, about what God can do:

Cause You know just what we need
Before we say a word

Oh how I long to feel secure and loved in the daily grind of life. God does that for me in my chaos and loneliness.

This Valentine’s day I want to lean into God’s love for me. Believing that I am His, and He is mine. ❤️. And that truth is more than enough love for any and all Valentine’s days.

But, why am I surprised?

 

The other day, I bought a chocolate for my husband, Mike. His favorite. While making dinner, I thought, “If I want to have Valentine’s chocolate, I have to buy it myself.”

I dug into the grocery bag, found that chocolate I bought for my husband, and ate it up. Not two minutes later, Michael walks in the door, with a heart-shaped box of chocolates for me. Can we just say “It’s not even Valentine’s day yet”?

Surprised.

God knows that I crave displays of affection from my husband that I didn’t verbally ask for. ❤️
I confessed my negative thinking to Mike, and was surprised again. Mike was understanding and sweet. We laughed about it and shared the chocolate with our kids.

Later,  I found a bunch of sparkly heart cut outs. “Mom, those are for you.” A sweet gift to decorate the fridge.

Surprised.  ❤️.

God knew I wondered if my boys thought about me in ways other than “how will you feed me?”

Michael shared with me this week that he wants to “study” me.  Huh?  In essence, he wants me to know how much he loves me and is willing to show me how he notices me.

Surprised. ❤️.

Honestly,  I have longed to hear something like that for many years.  And my husband is backing those words with beautiful actions that I don’t feel I deserve.  God knows what I need. And He is providing in ways beyond what I can dream up in my head.

This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins. 1John 4:10.

God’s love is way bigger and better than the love of a husband or our children.  Even so, He shows us love in a language we can understand.  Through our people.  God delights in surprising us with Love. May we believe in an eternal love.  The love that saves us and makes us new:  God’s love.

What are your thoughts on love and Valentine’s Day?  Have you been surprised by God?